My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
