I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize