I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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