i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just had sex on a roof
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
