I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
He better not be in your backpack
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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