just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
