i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
