It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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