I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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