Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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