There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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