Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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