ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
