He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
