(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
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