saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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