I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
