Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
