Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
