you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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