covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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