i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Boobs are out for the taking
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
