paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
