Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
