I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize