just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE