I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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