I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
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