one two three fourrrrnication!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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