First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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