I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
