I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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