went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
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You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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