im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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