HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
