Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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