Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
