So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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