I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
