): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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