oh god the rape fog is back!
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
