Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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