So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
