But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
