the day after is always just damage control
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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