Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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