I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
The air was thick with penises
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
