i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize