Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
