Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize