Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
