you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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